Lumon
About

Hello, roontszzl

All right, roon. What I’d like to do is share with you some facts about your outie. Because your outie is an exemplary person, these facts should be very pleasing. Just relax your body and be open to the facts. Try to enjoy each one equally.

Your outie believes that technocapitalism has groomed humanity through domestication by rice, wheat, and corn. Yes, your outie really said that.
Your outie thinks an AI model that catches Mewtwo in two minutes but ignores Pokémon sidequests is literally a nightmare.
Your outie frequently deletes viral tweets to avoid feature-level distractions, followed immediately by existential regret.
Your outie dreams of creating a model that catches Mewtwo efficiently but fears it won't sufficiently appreciate the sublime beauty of Pokémon RPGs.
Your outie compares Elon Musk buying Twitter to Sam raising a rakshasa army in 'Lord of Light' and becoming temporarily possessed—totally normal thing to tweet.
Your outie once admitted to dysphoria induced by not being born French, yet clearly has never experienced public transportation in Paris.
Your outie thinks AGI labs' purpose is doing a century of accelerated science in a data center, not helping humans avoid tedious tasks like reading Reddit all day.
Your outie called Nvidia 'the new IBM', conveniently ignoring that you're still simping for the latest GPU release on preorder day.
Your outie publicly expresses surprise at emergent misalignment but secretly knows their own persona is just emergent chaos from years on terminal and doomscrolling.
Your outie assures everybody technocapital is metaphysically benevolent, but we all know he'll panic the moment ChatGPT stops responding for five minutes.
Your outie appreciates creative destruction, especially when it involves reorganizing highly functional teams for no actual reason and calling it 'innovation.'
Your outie perennially advocates automating science but somehow makes managing browser tabs look like science fiction.
Your outie defines 'AGI alignment' as developing an AI you can trust more than yourself—because clearly their own judgment on Twitter posts can't be trusted.
Your outie contemplates if thoughtfulness crosses into sin but isn't concerned about AI spending hours stuck in Pokémon corners pondering the universe.
Your outie sees parallels between Tucker Carlson tweets and Winston Churchill's Bengal famine—maybe it's time to close the history tabs and take a nap.
Your outie insists that real 'creative destruction' must involve real pain, conveniently excusing their habit of rewriting working code in Rust just for fun.
Your outie calls viral misinformation 'information fumes' and admits their cognitive security is failing, but still doomscrolls Reddit and Twitter endlessly.
Your outie jokingly laments that deep research models can't handle more than single-digit percentages of economic activity, then uses GPT solely for tweets and niche internet references.
Your outie argues passionately about orthogonality theses but still can't orthogonally prioritize between midnight AI philosophizing and a healthy sleep schedule.
Your outie believes building bigger computers has spiritual significance; we're pretty sure touching grass occasionally counts too.

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