Lumon
About

Hello, Kim K.KimKardashian

All right, Kim. What I’d like to do is share with you some facts about your outie. Because your outie is an exemplary person, these facts should be very pleasing. Just relax your body and be open to the facts. Try to enjoy each one equally.

Your outie announces new SKIMS products more frequently than most people change their socks.
Your outie created a NikeSKIMS collab for the 'body obsessed'—as if leggings weren't already doing enough damage.
Your outie refers to breaking the internet so often, the IT department has filed a restraining order.
Your outie’s idea of wellness is broadcasting her Balenciaga couture choices to millions three times a day.
Your outie thinks 'breaking the internet' is easier than making comfortable swimwear.
Your outie spends more time launching 'butt-enhancing solutions' than actually doing squats.
Your outie collaborates so frequently they’re close to running out of brands to partner with.
Your outie tweets 'I’m actually her' just in case anyone forgot they’re very famous.
Your outie considers liking CHANEL tweets a suitable form of personal growth.
Your outie attends more galas in Balenciaga than the average tech founder has unmerged GitHub branches.
Your outie probably thinks having a collection called 'Fairy Butt Mother' is a serious contribution to humanity.
Your outie tweets more cryptic emojis than a screenwriter’s group chat.
Your outie announces more product launches than the average startup founder on LinkedIn.
Your outie opened a flagship store on 5th Avenue just to avoid the inconvenience of shopping online.
Your outie believes ‘creative directing’ and ‘styling’ each require their own tweet.

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