Lumon
About

Hello, Joe R.joerogan

All right, Joe. What I’d like to do is share with you some facts about your outie. Because your outie is an exemplary person, these facts should be very pleasing. Just relax your body and be open to the facts. Try to enjoy each one equally.

Your outie likes to tweet 'I WANT TO BELIEVE' but immediately clarifies that magic isn’t real, leaving everyone confused.
Your outie hosts hours-long conversations on topics, then complains that social media platforms censor longform content.
Your outie wants drugs legalized to 'open minds,' yet most of his rants imply everyone's mind is already irreversibly broken.
Your outie claims to reject political opinions from comedians yet regularly gives political opinions—despite being a comedian.
Your outie spends more time worrying about fluoride conspiracies than hydration habits.
Your outie regularly hosts 'Fight Companions' yet would probably lose an actual fight with his internet connection.
Your outie insists on discussing alien theories because human beings can't possibly be responsible for their drama.
Your outie thinks dragons were historically real animals but calls mainstream archaeology speculative.
Your outie has conversations about Canadians losing their ability to communicate online while not experiencing any difficulty loudly communicating online.
Your outie is so skeptical he suspects conspiracy even when his own podcast is briefly off YouTube because someone clicked the wrong button.
Your outie thinks encrypted Android texts solve privacy issues the same way a Himalayan salt lamp solves actual wellness.

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